I eat pain like it’s my last meal

but sometimes I’m still hungry

 

I rather starve than feed on swords and scars

that are harming me

 

It’s no warning me

No alarming me

 

I’m blind to red things, big things, dead things

I don’t want to see

 

It’s dangerous…

walking in the dark

Streetlights is off

Navigation ain’t no walk in the park

 

I’m tryna make it home

before before I bleed out

In streets and corners only content with bringing heat out

 

And it’s heating up

Do I measure up?

 

Can replace pints, ounces, and quarts spilling out my cup?

 

Mama, said don’t cry the milk already on the floor

 

Being sad ain’t always bad…it just ain’t never manifested more

 

In poor, priceless, pitiful

pits of the hood

 

Good girls go bad

and street niggas are misunderstood

 

I understood traumas of my father

Weighed the options of what it would look like

to be a growing imagine of his daughter

 

Then I faltered

I stumbled, I struggled

Hesitated, but I healed

 

I had some more talks with God, and then I started to feel

 

Burdens real heavy and buried inside

traumas birthed in me that I adopted and thought had died

 

But all of it finds you

And it’s not always kind

 

It redefines,

meticulously realizes and realigns you

 

Until you treat it, beat it

Lay it down on the floor

 

I know you sad, but do you know what you’re crying for?

 

Whatcha crying for?

 

Whatcha crying for?

 

The milk is split

Whatcha dyin’ for?

 

Do your tears steer you?

Do you talk back to your eyes?

Can your pain hear you?

Is a purpose to the lies

you keep telling yourself?

 

Are you helping yourself?

 

You’re purposed…

Pain could be gain

It ain’t worthless

Pain could be game

It serves a purpose

 

Know it don’t feel good

Yea, pleasure is pleasurable

 

But it’s no use in trying to avoid the inevitable

The milk is spilt…

 

Cry if you need to

The milk is spilt

 

Gone and mop up your mess

The milk is spilt

 

Don’t delay or detest distress

The milk is spilt

 

But clean up after yourself

Spill the milk

 

And then take a breath

and think about what’s next

 

Feel the tears swelling up in yo chest

And then let it go…

 

Don’t let milk be the reason you forever freeze or froze

Don’t let milk be the reason you give up and fold

 

It’s already spilt…